On December 11, 2018, the Wall Street Journal had a front-page article with the headline, “More than ever, Americans age alone.” The subhead read, “Baby-boomers are feeling the impact of loneliness which is linked to early mortality.” The article seeks to link moral behavior and health outcomes. A few highlights from the article are worth our consideration as it relates to a Christian worldview.
The article begins by describing a Utah man who is retired who spends most of his days alone in his apartment, watching “Gunsmoke” waiting by a phone that rarely rings. We are told, “Old age wasn’t supposed to feel this lonely.” This man describes being married five times. “each bride bringing the promise of lifelong companionship” but we learn he has been divorced three times while being a widower twice. His legs ache, his balance is faulty, he has stopped going to church or seeking other outlets for community. “I get a little depressed from time to time,” he says.
The journal then tells us that that “Baby boomers are aging alone more than any generation in U.S. History, and the result of loneliness is a looming health threat.” The journal continues, “About one in 11 Americans age 50 and older lacks a spouse or living child. That amounts to about eight million people in the U.S. without close kin, the main source of companionship in old age, and their share in the population is projected to grow.”
The story in the article isn’t just a public health story; this is a story that seeks a critical analysis from a Christian worldview. The Bible tells says it is not good for man to be alone. The near eight million feeling the effects of loneliness is further evidence that we are far from what our Creator designed for us, and far from the fulfillment of God’s purposes. Interestingly, embedded at the beginning of the article is a clue to the epidemic of loneliness that a generation faces – the breakdown of the family.
This man’s story on the page of a December issue of the Wall Street Journal is a story that is repeated across our world as the sacred institution of marriage has felt the devastating effects of separating what God intended never to be put asunder.
The article continues by saying, “The baby boomers prized individuality and generally had fewer children and ended marriages in greater numbers than previous generations. More than one in four boomers is divorced or never married, census figures show. About one in six lives alone.”
How tragic! From a Christian perspective, individuality is not a bad thing, but if individuality is valued above all, then what you are inevitably left with is your individual self - alone. God created us for community, so he established marriage, and then from marriage community is built. Marriage is the bedrock of society.
The family is the remedy for the epidemic of loneliness. Joseph Hellerman, in his book When the Church was a Family: Recapturing Jesus’ Vision for Authentic Christian Community directly seeks to challenge individuality by saying:
Spiritual formation occurs primarily in the context of community. But as the modern cultural norm of what social scientists call “radical American individualism” extends itself, many Christians grow lax in their relational accountability to the church. Faith threatens to become an “I” not “us,” a “my God” not “our God” concern.
Hellerman’s overall thesis is that the church is built to be a family. The church, according to Hellerman, is a place that builds community around authentic Christianity, a Christianity described in Scripture as a brotherhood. Jesus was once told that his mother and brothers were standing outside asking to speak to him. Surprisingly to everyone listening, Jesus said, “Who is my mother, and who are my brothers?” And stretching out his hand toward his disciples, he said, “Here are my mother and my brothers! For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother.” (Matthew 12:48–50, ESV)
The rest of the story tells us how Jesus made those estranged from God a part of his family. Through the cross of Christ and through the empty tomb, we have been brought into the family of God. As Paul told the Ephesians, In love he predestined us for adoption to himself as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will, to the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved. (ESV)
We are a part of the family of God because Christ has made us his very own. Now we belong to him, and because we belong to him, we belong to each other.
The cure for loneliness if the family and the most significant family to belong to is the family of God. If you are a part of God’s family, you are never alone.
I am grateful for albertmohler.com for bringing this article to my attention.
Photo by Chris Buckwald on Unsplash